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Pending Abortion, Unplanned/Crisis Pregnancy or Possible Pregnancy Information

NOTE: - If you are pregnant again and plan on continuing the pregnancy, or are TTC, you may post on the message boards. We have several specialized boards for women who are TTC or pregnant and continuing the pregnancy. You can discuss the special issues that arise when you have had an abortion before, and now are purposely trying for a new pregnancy, as well as the issues that come up as you carry the new pregnancy to term. TTC and new pregnancies can only be discussed on their alloted boards, because this issue is very triggering for women who have had an abortion and are trying to deal with it. Check the message boards for help! Message Boards

If you or a friend, partner or relative has an Unplanned/Crisis Pregnancy, a possible pregnancy or a pending abortion, we DO care about you, and understand your concerns and fears! - However our "Site Policy" is that we don't allow discussion at our message boards, chats or email lists about upcoming abortions, unplanned/crisis pregnancies, or give advice to a woman considering an abortion, nor do we give advice to the friends, partners or relatives of a woman considering an abortion. If you are a current member here, and have a friend or relative who is pregnant and considering an abortion, we cannot talk about it on the boards here. We do have places where you can talk and find help - see the bottom of the page for these resources

Here's why we don't allow discussion
An unplanned pregnancy, and a woman considering what to do about it is a very touchy and very triggering subject for women trying to heal from their own abortion. It can be extremely upsetting to women who regret their abortion, and posts from women or partners or friends of women asking for advice or support for an upcoming abortion have been a big source of controversy in the past, and have led to arguments, fights, flames, and women being triggered unnecessarily. It takes the focus of our site from 'support' for post abortion women to 'debate' about abortion, and we don't want that. So our site policy is since this is a site for women healing "after" an abortion, we don't allow any message board discussion, emails or chatting talk of situations "before" an abortion.
Even women talking about a 'possible' new pregnancy (i.e. period late, they might be pregnanct, they're scared, etc) can be triggering, and upsetting to women trying to deal with their abortion. When we allowed posts like this on the boards in the past, it would draw very radical anti-abortion extremists to the site, who would post up very graphic and upsetting things to the woman who thought she might be pregnant, in order to make sure she wouldn't even consider an abortion. This was upsetting and scary for everyone at the site, to have their place of healing disrupted and bombarded with anti-abortion issues. So that's why any posts talking about a possible new pregnancy, or asking for advice or input about what to do with an unplanned pregnancy, or any posts related to an upcoming abortion will be deleted.

If you are pregnant and know you will be continuing the pregnancy this time, then check out our "Pregnancy after Abortion" message board - this board is for women who had an abortion at some point in their past, and now are having a baby.
If you are dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, you should see a private counselor before making ANY decision, (abortion, adoption or keeping the baby) and you should discuss your situation with the support people in your life, to help you understand all your options.
Where can I talk about my situation, or get support?

The best, and safest place is in private, with an in person counselor. This is the best way to evaulate your situation, and decide what is right for you. You can visit these online areas below for discussion and support, but be aware that there are extremist people (of both views) on the web, and arguing, inappropriate comments and unsupportive name calling can happen at times.

DISCLAIMER - The following links are for Prochoice and Prolife organizations and groups, to give a balanced selection. The links go to privately run email groups, websites and message boards, and the content and conduct is not monitored or guaranteed to be neutral by the PASS site - so use your own discretion when selecting and visiting these links.


  • The "I Might Be Pregnant" Email List - This list is for women who think they might be pregnant, and don't know what they are going to do. If your period is late, or you think you are pregnant, or want to talk about signs of possible pregnancy, or if you are pregnant and not sure what you want to do, here is an email list you can join to discuss your options. To join this group, visit - http://www.egroups.com/group/imbp

  • Discussion group for pre-abortion situations - contains members that are prolife and prochoice, so you will recieve opinions from both views http://groups.yahoo.com/group/pre_abortion_support

  • How effective are "Over the Counter" urine pregnancy tests? Click Here to find out which ones can tell you if you are pregnant sooner.

  • Planned Parenthood is an International Prochoice Organization - they will help you with pregnancy tests, find an abortion clinic in your area, and give you information about medical abortions (abortion pill), emergency contraception (morning after pill) and surgical abortion information. If you need financial help with paying for an abortion, or have questions about abortion procedures or how an abortion is done, they can help you.

  • ProChoice Hotline - Resource listing to find an abortion provider http://www.prochoicehotline.com

  • The Pregnancy Centers Online website can steer you to resources for pregnant women in your area. They are a pro-life organization, so the resources they have are for continuing your pregnancy. They will help you with counseling, pregnancy tests, medical care, baby supplies, maternity supplies, adoption information, information on WIC, welfare and other services for women who need help with food, medical care or money to continue a pregnancy. They can also help you find other resources in your area.

  • Adoption - If you are pregnant, and are considering giving your baby up for adoption, please look for special 'adoption support' websites online - www.birthmother.com is a great one. If you've had a previous abortion, and are pregnant again and are going to continue the pregnancy and give the baby up for adoption, you need special support. We can provide support for the pregnancy in general on our 'pregnancy support' board, however we ask that you please do not discuss adoption 'issues' there, or discuss your feelings about the adoption or the issues of adoption vs abortion, and which one is better/more difficult, ect. These types of discussions may bring out deep feelings in the other women there, and will lead to non-supportive debates over adoption vs abortion. So we ask that in order for you to get the support and help you need, please keep adoption related discussions at a website specifically designed to provide pre-adoption support.

  • Adoption Link - A Child To Love -This site has been designed to offer the opportunity for connection between couples/families and birthparents seeking to place their child for adoption to connect. http://achildtolove.com

  • Informational Link - http://www.choicetolivewith.com - The site is neither pro-life nor pro-choice, but it only seeks to help women decide, find accurate information, and find support as they go through this difficult time.

  • "Pre-Abortion Discussion" Email List - If you are considering an abortion, you can join this group. It contains members that are both prolife and prochoice, so you will get both views when you ask for advice here. http://www.egroups.com/group/pre_abortion_support

  • If you are having an abortion after a poor prenatal diagnosis, you can join this email support group, http://www.egroups.com/group/AHeartbreakingChoice This list called "A Heartbreaking Choice", is for parents who are terminating / have terminated after a poor prenatal diagnosis.

  • If you are feeling panicky and/or suicidal, visit the Crisis Intervention Page

  • You can visit ivillage's Abortion Support Board. This board is prochoice, and offers support to women considering an abortion and/or preparing for an abortion.

  • Diane Cheryl's Unplanned Pregnancy Discussions Message Board http://www.voy.com/66018/ This is a prolife message board run by Diane Cheryl, who has a website encouraging alternatives to an abortion (called "Abortion Alternatives"). The prolife women there can help you find resources if you are interested in keeping your baby, or putting it up for adoption.

  • The "Best Advice" Section. This is a compilation of advice from women who have had abortions. The women are both pro-choice, and pro-life, and both sides are presented. This info has been submitted by visitors to this site.
    Visit the Best Advice Results

  • Sometimes women want to know what a baby looks like at different weeks and stages in the development. It starts out as a single cell, and proceeds from there. To see accurate pictures of what an embryo looks like at different stages, visit these medical urls:

    The National Institutes of Child Health and Human Development.
    http://visembryo.ucsf.edu
    http://www.visembryo.com

    The Virtual Library of Developmental Biology
    http://zygote.swarthmore.edu

    The UNSW Embryology site and look at the Early Human Carnegie Stages pages
    UNSW Embryology site

    *Legal Disclaimer* This site is only the opinions and ideas of many women. No one should make any major decisions in their lives based solely upon what they read at this site! You should see a licensed counselor or health professional in your area, before you make any decisions about your pregnancy. If you decide to give your baby up for adoption, you should do the process through a lawyer, AND see a counselor. NEVER agree to an abortion or an adoption without seeing a professional counselor.

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